There is a lot of silence after quitting 15 years of work.
Good silence.
The kind of silence that gets in your head and makes you see the truth so plainly, that it is like a slap to the face, or a left hook.
That kind of reality check, that kind of clarity takes a lot of the fear away. It allows you to move past the past and into a brand new future.
Forced isolation, thanks to Covid-19 and lots of jobless time have made me see exactly what those 15 years were.
Nothing more than a puff of smoke, if even that.
Eckhart Tolle said our lives are like a dash on our tombstone. The only notable points are the date of birth, and the date of death. All that happened in between is summed up with a dash.
So to with my 15 years. June 2005 – June 2020. Ha! Ha!
This all sounds a bit depressing, but actually it is quite freeing. There is no longer any weight or meaning to those 15 years. There is nothing holding me anymore. I am untethered.
Some things try to pull me back, but I no longer have those heavy feelings of responsibility. It was a false responsibility to begin with. I was a fiercely loyal and caring employee, to a fault. This was never valued or appreciated, and that is okay. No regrets.
In truth, I believe that if I had of been the real me, then I would have been valued and appreciated. I wish I could have been more of a free spirit then.
I can now.
I am now.
