Category: Joy

Posted on

Piles

When I was working I accumulated piles.

No not, hemorrhoids!

Actual piles of ‘to do later’ stuff.

Piles of ‘I can’t deal with that now’ stuff.

And mental piles, virtual to do lists that clog up the brain like sludge.

Come to think of it, they are sort of like hemorrhoids. Ugh.

Piles destroy your quality of life. You cannot live well when you have piles, of any type.

I quite literally had decades of stuff piled up. The actual piles of stuff like paper etc. were annoying to clean up and time consuming but once all was sorted, trashed, cleaned and put away, I could start working on the mental piles.

Things that are stashed away in your mind are the things that make you exhausted and irritable and sometimes crazy. They are unfinished business, and your brain hates unfinished business. It will work 24/7 to solve your problems, to get what you want, to complete your lists whether you are conscious of them or not. This is what your brain is suppose to do; think, solve, plan, organize, be a manager of the rest of you. So mentally file something away and your brain is on it! And no, writing them down does not quiet your brain. It will work even harder on those because they are in writing

The tasks of finishing the unfinished, loving the unloved and the neglected is gut wrenching. From the simple things of sewing a bra strap back on, to finally writing a thank you note (it is never too late for either, your bra and friends understand) I gradually cleared all those mental to do lists out. In the process I discovered many things I’d forgotten about. Embarrassing stuff. Silly stuff. Oh, that would have been great to do stuff.

The great thing about being retired – no matter how short term this may prove to be (money!) is I seemingly have vast expanses of time to do more. Seemingly, because now I really don’t want to do more. I’ve stopped collecting piles, real and imagined and just live for the moment. If something catches my attention, well, if I don’t do it now, I probably will never do it. I will not file it away as a to do later, or sometime if I feel like it.

I am happy to be free of piles for the time being. Life gets so far ahead of you when you are working. Your life belongs to the office and everything else is neglected. So glad those days are OVER.

Posted on

Near Death Experiences

Many years ago, at the dawn of Harry Potter, my friend and I, being of an older generation, were intrigued and wanted to discover what all the fuss was about.

Now I know at the moment J.K. Rowling, Harry Potters’ author is getting some bad press about something she posted that I have not read, nor do I even want to go there, but at the time, she was high priestess. So it was pretty close to sacrilege to not take Harry Potter seriously.

Knowing this, we decided to take in the movie, the original, at a big theatre in town. The place was packed. We took a spot among the throngs of mostly youth and settled in with popcorn, not knowing what to expect. We had not read the book, nor had much clear idea of what we would see other than wizards and some special effects.

It was enjoyable and fun, until we met the dog.

The dog in the movie is a massive, menacing, drooling, outright terrifying 3 headed cerebus from hell (but not that scary really). But when the keeper was asked what the dogs name was, well, my friend an I literally fell out of our seats in hysterical laughter at his reply.

“Fluffy”

When we composed ourselves that theatre was so quiet it was like a morgue, but with a thousand eyes all trained on us. For a moment I thought they would stop the movie, turn on the lights and throw us out!

We stayed to the end, frozen in our seats, daring not to even sniffle. At the end we slunk out like a couple of felons on a day pass.

Our apologies to Fluffy et al.

Posted on

Only WE

Often lately I’ve been hearing we are in end times, and over the last few years, it definitely appears to be. I have been surprised that even atheist friends have mentioned we are stepping into the Book of Revelation. This is not said glibly, but with some panic and belief.

I once read a book about the Book of Revelation that suggested this is a period of enlightenment as opposed to wanton destruction. That all of these problems; fires, floods, pollution, corruption, poverty, suffering, political upheavals, all this chaos, is a call for us to embrace love. It is meant to open our hearts and make us see the truth.

That is what Revelation is, an awakening. Enlightenment. The truth revealed.

The truth is, there is no US and THEM. There is only WE. We are one.

We are all humans, living in the same place, with nowhere else to go, despite what Elon Musk might envision for Mars (an entirely hostile place. WHY would we leave this Eden to live there?) We are a global community. You can’t separate one place from another. Not with walls, moats, fences, hedges, conspiracy theories or hoaxes! All other living creatures, plants and lo and behold, viruses, understand this. It is just humans with our little egos that don’t. The sooner we get this, the sooner we can fix the world.

My cat is a cat, and I don’t have any prejudices against tabbies, or tuxedo, or persians, or scottish folds or . . . they are all CATS.

We are all humans. It does not matter what we look like, where we live or what we think. We are all the same! We share the same world and the same problems. Why can’t people get this? Because they are not enlightened. And this is what it is all about.

This age of Revelation is going to continue until we smarten up. Our resistance to our problems perpetuates them. And that is probably why the Bible gives us such a terrifying account. It shows us what our ignorance is capable of, and it ain’t pretty.

The sooner we all return to love and oneness, the quicker our suffering will end. The faster our global disasters will subside. We created our own messes, we can clean them up.

There is only WE.

Posted on

Trust Not Hope

Now that I find myself in a situation where the future is a vast unknown, I am adrift and basically trying anything that comes my way to see if it fits, I have learned the difference between trust and hope.

Most of my life I have hoped for better. Hoping for things is merely wishing. Hope is limp. It is lame. It has no action attached to it. “Oh, I hope for the best.” Blah.

Trust however, is empowering. To trust in something is to have faith, and faith that is unshakeable can move mountains.

To trust that everything will work out means that I will put forth the effort necessary, safe in the knowing that the universe, the Divine, God, is not indifferent. I do not know what the results of my efforts will be, but I can trust that God has my back. No matter what happens, it will benefit my growth, or someone else. Something will happen.

Hope means I am looking for a certain outcome. Trust means whatever happens will be good in some way. Hope closes you off. Trust opens you up. Trust helps you get past fear.

Hope is to give up and do nothing. Trust is to plunge forward and do everything you can, God will direct your path.

Though the corona virus has severely curtailed what actions I can take in the outside world, it just means working a bit harder on the inside. I am discovering a lot of interesting things.

Posted on

Worthless

This is how I’ve felt for most of my adult life. Worthless.

I struggled so hard in my office jobs. I am inept at office work. I am incompetent as a secretary, receptionist and clerk.

So forever I have felt worthless just because I’ve been doing the wrong kind of work!

That has defined my entire adult life.

I wonder how many other people feel worthless just because they are in the wrong place, or with the wrong person, or in the wrong job.

Women of my generation had very few career choices unless they were prepared to fight hard. Most of us accepted our lot and trudged on.

So for 40 plus years I have felt needlessly worthless. It caused me to get nearly everything else wrong in my life too. Wrong partners. Wrong places to live. Wrong friends.

I am astonished by this revelation, that there was never anything wrong with me, I was just a square peg being squashed into a round hole.

Absolutely amazing.

Posted on

Get Out!

If you are in a job that ranges from mildly unsatisfactory to totally dysfunctional, get out!

Believe me, the longer you stay in an unhealthy situation, the greater the toll. You will not be aware of the damage over time as you numb yourself to constant pain, tell yourself lies and deceive yourself that everything is okay in a soul sucking job and/or with a psycho boss.

Pay attention to those red flags. They could save your life.

The more you excuse and tolerate a bad situation, the more contracted you become until you see no way out. You can see no options, no alternatives. You believe you can’t escape.

Until you do.

There is absolutely nothing worse than being in a place, or with a person, that preys on your insecurities, devalues you, or even just bores you out of your mind.

Get out!

Even if you have to take less pay, or be unemployed for a while, or do something totally out of your skill set and experiences, even at this time of record unemployment, it is far, far better than gritting your teeth and enduring something or someone who eats your soul. You will pay and the injuries may never heal.

And when you do get out, spend time with yourself and listen to your emotions without judgement. If you’re angry, sit with it, don’t act out, acknowledge that you have the right to be angry, that it is okay to be mad and truly feel it. You are NOT this anger. The anger is an emotion that needs to be seen and felt and loved. This is extremely important. Emotions have a lot of information to help you. If you have unresolved issues, you will leap from the frying pan into the fire. It happened to me, I went from bad to much much worse because I didn’t listen to myself.

A good book to read is, You Are Enough by Panache Desai.

Here is another truth worth sharing, people don’t quit jobs, they quit bosses.

Trust your instincts.

Believe in yourself.

Make your escape plan and get the hell out!

And love whatever you are feeling without acting it out.

Posted on

What a Dollar Can Do

Imagine if everyone in this world received a basic income.

For the want of a very small amount of money people cannot move forward in their lives.

It usually does not take much to have peace of mind. Enough to pay the rent. Enough to buy food. Enough to make a dream come true.

If everyone had enough money for their basic needs, what do you think this would mean?

No more poverty. It’d reduce crime.

Most people are not lazy. But most people are desperate and living on the edge. If they have a guaranteed income, it gives them freedom to become all that they can be. How could this not benefit the entire world?

The ones who do not want to work, this is totally okay. I mean, think about it. We already have that. What harm is in it? Most people want to have purpose and to be contributing to society. So most will continue to work. The ones that don’t, so what? They are in the minority.

I think this pandemic has exposed the huge flaws in capitalism. That the rich get insanely more rich, and the poor insanely more desperate.

The people who resist basic income are the uber rich because they want to enslave people. Their employees. There are very rare exceptions to this.

What if people could no longer be enslaved? What kind of revolution would we see in the working world? I envision a much safer, freer, compassionate working environment. Why do employers feel they must control their employees like they are children? If they have what they need, are treated like adults, and enjoy their work, and have respect for their bosses, a good job will be done.

What kind of revolution would we see in fixing the global messes we have of pollution, climate change, despots, dictators?

Before you dismiss universal basic income, give it a lot of thought how it would affect your life. What would you do with it? Make a dream come true? Go back to school? Quit your soul sucking job and do something you enjoy? Donate the money to charity? Volunteer? Work less hours and contribute more to friends, family time, strangers?

Obviously, the money has been there this whole time. It just hasn’t been used properly.

Posted on

Lockdown

We’ve been in ‘isolation’ and social distancing for only a month, and people are whining like crazy about it.

I’d bet a month ago, most were complaining about having to go to work!

What if you were really a prisoner, doomed to solitary confinement for life?

This ‘lockdown’ is only for a few months out of your whole entire life. AND it is for your and others safety.

Hello? This virus is quick and causes immense suffering and death. Is it worth going out for a get together, a concert, a meal, a rally, a protest, something social that lasts a few hours which you can’t wait to get back home and be alone again?

Here you are in the comfort of your own home. You can have most of what you need delivered. Computers enable us to chat and see our loved ones, do our work, be creative or just waste a whole lot of time on.

We have books and articles to read. Courses to take. Hobbies to start or dust off and rediscover. Instruments to play. Movies to watch. You could completely reinvent yourself!

This is a gift of time few of us ever get. Every day is ours!

I know there are difficulties. Children mostly I have heard. Normally when you don’t see or hear from your children for 10 minutes you freak out.

I get it. Being stuck with others 24/7 is definitely a challenge.

So this is a time of zen. Accept what is happening and deal with it! What a rare opportunity for personal and professional growth!

To clean the house.

Play with our pets.

Do nothing!

Grow up. Be responsible. Change your habits and perspective. Get your creative mind to work. We all need new ideas. Maybe change the world.

If you do have to go out, and many of us do, please wear a mask and gloves. Protect yourself and keep a safe distance from others. This is no time for vanity about how you look (though some people have been mask fashionistas!).

This is not forever.

Posted on

Oh, So Much!

There is so much I could rant about today.

But then there is this:

There is oh SO much to be grateful for, despite the times we are in.

Our animal companions.

The people on the front lines.

Our home comforts. Food. Computers. Technology. Good friends.

Look at the thousands upon thousands of good deeds being done every single day due to this pandemic. It is bringing out our true nature – LOVE!

Oh, yeah, there are some stupid shits, but they are a very tiny fraction of the population and not representative of most of the human race.

We are not the corruption of politicians. We are not the dirty laundry of big corporations. We are bigger and better than all of these self serving rats! We are good people.

My biggest hope is we emerge from this with a new framework on how to conduct business – with love, not to fatten bank accounts of grossly overcompensated shareholders and CEO’s. Our education system is improved so that people understand geography, environment, politics, humanity, how to think, and solve problems, and our teachers are well compensated. Our health care is just that, health care, not survival of the richest, it is for everyone and it is FREE. We finally stop talking and take action. We clean up all the pollution we’ve created and pass very strict laws to prevent contamination of our planet. No one should suffer any issue in any country.

We finally come to our senses. We are a global community. We need to celebrate our diversity and embrace it, because there are so many great ideas, art, music, technology, you name it, that we can share and create and make this world an Eden. Together!